Dear America

What’s the Worst That Can Happen?

We’re all going to die eventually, right? I mean, at this rate, America, probably we are all gonna go pretty much at once and take the rest of the world with us.

Dear World, including America,

You know the “Back to the Future” movie franchise? You know how what’s his face, the shithead kid, Biff Buffington or Biffington or Bufflebutt or whatever the hell his name was… you know how he became president in that story and that the writers based him on Trump and that mostly he was a big fucking shithead but… well, Jesus, I don’t recall there being the kind of apocalyptic hellscape in those movies as we have right now. Biff Boofington was a better choice in president. (This probably remains the case. It is trash day here, and there is a sludge at the bottom of the neighbor’s recycling bin that is probably a better choice in president than 45.)

And of course you hope at the beginning that he grows into the job. That at the very least he maybe can appoint the best people and let them do the really heavy lifting. I know that politics doesn’t work that way. You have your experts in to brief you on the mountains of paperwork you read nightly (if you are a normal president and are capable of reading)… But hell, even if you aren’t capable of reading you have your experts in, and they tell you shit, and you ask the other experts in the overlapping areas what they think, and you let them fight it out, and you make a decision. And yeah, sometimes that decision is ultimately in line with the ideas of the last person in the room with the president (apparently this was a thing with Bush the Lesser, who, while a really shitty president who did really shitty things — yes, likely up to and including some war crimes — at least recognized that other human beings… are. They have lives and feelings and shit.)

So it’s not as simple as getting experts to weigh in and run their shit, and in any event, the piece of shit would have had to pick the best people and stop firing and driving out the public servants who actually support their departments and do their damnedest to keep shit on the rails. I mean, I get that. Everyone wants something and nothing is easy, especially, you know, the presidency.

But how monumentally fucked is all this? Like, who fucks up this badly and gets off without penalty? There’s two hundred thousand Americans dead in the past six months. Turns out, he was telling Bob Woodward that he was most certainly aware of how bad COVID 19 was (of all people, hahaha. You know half of Bob Woodward’s brain’s processing power was all like, “This guy is such a fucking idiot he’s talking to me, thinking that the pearls of… whatever this glistening slime is… falling from his mouth is actually the voice of competence and reason. Why does anyone take my phone calls anymore?”)

I mean, of course he knew. I wasn’t anywhere near a governmental center but I knew. Doctors and public health people were all like, “Don’t be afraid, but take this seriously and be careful.” Which is all the orange man had to do, and then let the grown ups in emergency management and health services and logistics handle the rest. But for some reason, all the stuff that could have helped in the general stockpile suddenly had Jared Kushner’s name written on it, and he licked all the protective equipment just to make sure it was “his.” That’s what he said. He said the federal stockpile of emergency supplies “belongs to us.”

I guarantee you, you and I are not part of his us.

I mean, is it possible that the orange guy is so devoid of insight that he thinks this is how people are? That he is… normal? I certainly find large numbers of anything hard to grasp… people, cash, acres of damage from natural disasters… but then I think of the orange guy being told, on live television, that Jamal Khashoggi was murdered in the Saudi Embassy in Turkey and asked if that was going to impact any talks and deals going forward and he asked if Mr. Khashoggi was a citizen (naturalized, of course, because clearly this motherfucker could give two shits about green card holders until he’s going to marry one)… and hearing that he was a resident, but not a citizen, did the motherfucking math on live television and decided maybe some number of dollars from Saudi Arabia was worth more than a man’s life. I know I couldn’t do that. Because I can’t picture the giant number of dollars, but I can most definitely relate to the man.

That’s what killed me. He put that man on a scale, his voting potential on a scale, yea, verily, his brownness on a scale, and put some not quite nearly nailed down deal for selling planes and missiles to Saudi Arabia on the other scale, and found the man’s life was worth less than the promise of some money.

Fuck Donald Trump. Fuck him a thousand times over. Fuck him two hundred thousand and one times over. Hell, fuck everyone like him. I can’t picture two hundred thousand people easily, but I can imagine what it must be like to lose one (sure, I sure can. So can you. So can everyone) prematurely and unfairly and under circumstances you wish were so very different. I can’t imagine the pain and horror of two hundred thousand, but it’s because imagining that pain and horror ten, twenty, a hundred times… is more than enough.

I can’t imagine losing 70% of a town to fire. I can imagine losing a house, or a library, or a church, or any place that might have great meaning to a person.

It’s just fucking empathy. Is it so goddamn hard not to be an asshole? Is it so goddamn hard not to be an asshole every goddamn day in every goddamn aspect of your goddamn life? Why is this condoned at all? Does the rest of this family think this is normal? How about Mark Meadows, the chief of staff, once a House guy from… North Carolina? Is that where he was from? I mean, call him a racist and he weeps as though his soul has been wounded deeply, but he was all for sending Obama to Kenya because… because Mark Meadows at least realizes it sucks to be called a racist even if it’s the god’s honest truth… so he apparently does give a shit what people think, even if he doesn’t actually give a shit about… people?

How the fuck are all these people so bereft of any moral bearing or sense of what is right or fair or decent all in this one place? Why the fuck are there so many of them? Why do they still have access to the goddamn nuclear codes?

Jesus, World, I am so sorry.